Him: How many assault rifles do you own?
Me: I don’t own any assault rifles, machine guns require a special license to own and I don’t have it.
Him: OK, how many “modern sporting rifles” do you own?
Me: How long is your penis?
Him: Excuse me, what did you just say?
Me: I asked how long your penis is.
Him: WTF does that have to do with anything?
Me: Oh, sorry, I thought we were having a session of “asking each other questions that’s none of the other person’s damned business…”
Him: You guns are my business because you can use them to shoot me.
Me: Your penis size is my business, because you can try to rape me with it.
Him: I would NEVER try to rape anybody!!!!
Me: I would NEVER shoot anybody, so I guess that makes us even.
Him: You gun nuts are all alike!!!
Me: What, you mean we aren’t ashamed to admit the size of our genitals? Yeah, I can see that.
Him: (walks off in a huff)
Me: Thinking “dat’s right, walk away with your high and mighty morals and cashew sized wanker…”